Christmas Eve Musings

Right now I'm sitting in my dining room next to the Christmas tree, listening to Christmas Gregorian chants playing quietly in the background. Soon I'll be watching It's a Wonderful Life with my family while eating popcorn. But right now I wanted to sit down and type.
It's been a long semester. It's been filled with school, with extracurriculars, with college applications, with stress. But with Christmas here, I've been able to relax. To forget about some of the things that have been stressing me all semester. For me, Christmas has always been a time to take a break from the long year and just relax. It's often a haven in a sea of the year. And in that respect it hasn't been any different.
However, it has been different in some ways: I'm using this Christmas season to prepare myself for the last semester of high school. And I'm using it to be thankful for the little things. I suppose you could say that that has been the theme of this Christmas season for me. It's been all about little things:
My favorite Christmas song coming on the radio while I'm driving to Starbucks.
Finding the perfect Christmas present for someone.
Spending time with my closest friends.

Watching glitter gleam in the shine of Christmas lights.

Making fudge and candy.

Dancing with my favorite person.

Wearing red lipstick.
Talking to my best friends before watching The Hobbit.
Cuddling up on the couch with a blanket to watch a movie.
Snuggling in blankets with my cousin watching one of our favorite TV shows late at night.
Walking around in an abandoned barn.

Being reminded of my favorite things.
Perfectly wrapping a present or fluffing up tissue paper in a bag just right.
Simply having best friends.

Carefully unwrapping a present.
Going shopping and singing along with the radio while walking around in the cold.
Sitting in Starbucks on Christmas Eve, drinking chai, reading The Fellowship of the Ring.
The sheer, bare beauty of winter.

It has really been all about the little things in life. But isn't that what life really is? A conglomeration of little things fit together in a perfect puzzle of life?
Although we talk about the "big" things that happen in our life, and although those big things are important, our life consists of these little things. These every day beauties that pop up all around us. And even the big things come about because of the normal things that occur day to day.
The little things of this season have been everything about this season. Although it hasn't been a terribly eventful Christmas season, the little things have made it all that it is. It really has been a beautiful season, thanks to the little things, family, and incredible friends who have filled it.

Sunday is Coming - BEDA #7

Friday seemed like the end.
Friday seemed like the destruction of hope.

But Friday was a beginning.
A promise.
The New Covenant.
We are now able to be alive in Christ.
We didn't have to pay the price.
He payed the price.
On Friday.
And Sunday is coming.

Merry Christmas here's to many more

It's almost Christmas day.
As I sit on my bed with my Christmas, knee-toe socks, listening to my favorite Relient K Christmas songs, I can barely believe it's almost here. It feels like the season just began. And now it's almost over.
I've spent the past few days doing typical Christmasy things. Thursday was my baking fest: two batches of cookies, a batch of fudge, and two pecan pies. Three hours in the kitchen. It's not very often that I have the time or inclination to bake for three (or maybe it was four...) hours, but it just seemed like a classic Christmas thing to do. And oh how I do love baking. It fills the air with a scents of Christmas. (aha. Look at what I did there. Isn't that funny? No? Okay...)
Christmas presents galore today. My cousins, my brother, and I all went out mid afternoon today to do last minute Christmas shopping. Shops bursting at the seams with lots of folks and people smiling more than usual. Boots and hats and sweaters if you felt like being Christmasy even though it was in the 60s or 70s. It's so lovely to see everyone with Christmas in their hearts.
Despite the fact that I'm 16, Christmas holds a certain magic to it. I've almost always been one of those starry eyed, head-in-the-clouds kind of girls - reading the whole Anne of Green Gables series didn't help matters much. And so when something that's generally known as magical comes around, I'm all the more starry eyed, head-in-the-clouds. If you had been looking out the window of one of the houses in my neighborhood today, you might have spotted me skipping down the street gleefully looking at the pretty clouds and bright blue skies listening to Christmas Lights on my iPod. Every Christmas, and this year particularly, certain songs, smells, sights remind me of being a little kid. It's so beautiful.
I love how there is one time in the year that everyone wants to spend it doing traditional things, and spend it remembering, loving, cherishing those dear old memories of long ago (or not so long ago). Everyone becomes a child around Christmas. Everyone comes together, and there's a sense of love and that wintry color of blue in the air.

Every day during the Christmas season, I'm more than likely to get the chills thinking about a perfect Christmas scene. I smile as I open my windows in the morning and look at the chilly morning outside, frost on the ground, blue light making its way through the clouds covering any and all sky. If no one is looking, I might twirl around the kitchen for a full minute while humming I Hate Christmas Parties. I still go in the dining room where our Christmas tree is to count presents. I'll sit on my bed drinking chai or hot chocolate staring complacently out into the wintry clouds listening to I Celebrate the Day. And I may or may not dance around my room lip-syncing to All I Want for Christmas is You if I'm in not such a cozy-sweaters-and-chai mood.

Yes, indeed, I believe something fills me around Christmas that no other time of year can do. Oh yes, I'm a generally very happy person. But at Christmas I find a little bit more secret kind of joy. It's not the kind that everyone can see. It's a deep feeling of absolute bliss. A feeling of winter and blue skies and snow and white lights. A simple kind of peace. Peace.... candles flickering. Knitting fingerless gloves and leg warmers. Blankets and good books. Fires. It's that simplicity and complete contentedness that makes my heart so thrilled. And although if you were to look at me at such a moment of contentedness, you might only see a slight smile, as Anne of Green Gables would say, "I'm thrilled to the very depths of my soul."

I don't know if everyone enjoy Christmas in such a childish way as I do, but I believe that most people enjoy some sort of light feeling around the heart at this time of year. Amid all the stress of present wrapping and Christmas cookie baking, I think most people find some time to sit down and appreciate some sort of James Taylor easiness in their soul. (and if they don't, they must have an absolutely rotten month) It's so good to be around people who all feel that kind of joy.
One thing that has changed since when I was kid was that all I ever used to think about were the presents. Sure, I liked looking at lights and watching Christmas movies, but it all led up to the day that you actually opened presents. Now I couldn't care less about the presents. I just love the general mood. The beauty and wonder of the smiling heart. I care about the love that is spread. And I care about the childlike wonder that people are more likely to feel around Christmastime. It's a beautiful thing.

Another beautiful thing is the story about a teenage girl, a carpenter, and a baby born in a stable and placed in an animal trough. The story that continues to a cross. The story that tells of a loving Savior. One that would allow us to receive grace and redemption. The Christmas story gives us the promise stated in Ephesians 2:4-7, "But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ - by grace you have been saved - and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus." We have received this grace because of that lovely story that Linus tells in A Charlie Brown Christmas. Tidings of great joy. On earth peace and good will toward men.

Fragile finger sent to heal us

Tender brow prepared for thorn

Tiny heart whose blood will save us

Unto us is born

Unto us is born

So wrap our injured flesh around You

Breathe our air and walk our sod

Rob our sin and make us holy

Perfect Son of God

Welcome to our world 

Merry Christmas!
Here's to many more


{and I'm off to enjoy the typical Christmas Eve traditions - crab soup, opening one present, and watching a delightful Christmas classic... most likely It's a Wonderful Life or How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Oh how I love them both. Who doesn't love Dr. Seuss and Jimmy Stewart?}

Christ is Risen

But the angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid,

for I know that you seek Jesus
Who was crucified.
He is not here,
for He has risen, as He said."

Happy Easter everyone! I have been so joyful today as I remember that Christ is risen indeed. And we have full assurance that we can have life through Him. Today is the most important day on the calendar, because it is the day we remember we have salvation that we never could have gained ourselves.
This day is especially important because, as Paul said, if Jesus had just died, and not risen, we would have no assurance of faith. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:17-19, "And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied." But then Paul goes on to say in verse 20, "But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead." Therefore, we have assurance of salvation. Christ is risen, just as He said.

He poured out His soul to death
and was numbered with the transgressors;
yet He bore the sins
of many
and makes intercession for the transgressors.
Isaiah 53:12

Shout for joy to God, all the earth;
sing the glory of His name;
give to Him glorious praise!

Psalm 66:1-2

Starbucks & Other Doings

So. I've been thinking about so many things lately. Thoughts just floating around in my mind. Too many things really. I feel like my mind is about to bust with all the things I have been considering and turning over in my mind as of late.

Such as
Starbucks.
Yes, Starbucks is too big a part of my life. My mom and I go to a particular Starbucks every single Sunday afternoon/evening and talk for a good hour or two. It's just a habit of ours, and a very delightful one at that. But I have discovered we've been going there far too often. There is a nice young guy up there who almost always works Sunday afternoons/evenings, and so we see him all the time. A few weeks ago he commented, "I seem to see y'all a lot up here." We just chuckled and agreed. And tonight, I had the pleasure and yet almost horror of discovering he knows my name. You know, they always ask for your name so they can write it on the cup, and after I ordered, he looked at me holding his Sharpie and said, "Madison?" I just grinned and nodded. I find it somewhat disturbing that this guy who I know nothing about and who I've never had a proper introduction to or conversation with; this guy knows my name? Somewhat odd.
But that is the consequence of going to Starbucks too much, I suppose.

Other doings.
Well, we all know what tomorrow is.
Valentine's Day.
The big day.
That is, the day that MOST people freak out because they don't have a "Valentine." Well, I already had two nice guys be my "Valentine" this year. ;-) Hehe! Ahhh the joys of being loved. First of all, my wonderful Daddy, who always gets me something, got me a huge box of Russell Stover chocolate and a card. =) I definitely have to say, my Dad has got to be the best in the whole world. Ever. The picture of what he got is over there. <----------
And then.... there was my boyfriend. :] He got me a super cute mug from Starbucks (if you've been to Starbucks recently, I'm sure you know one of the ones I'm talking about ;) and then some snack stuff from Starbucks. It made me sooopperr happy (yeah, I have to spell super wrong to make an emphasis. Sorry) SO. that is my Valentine's Day. Tomorrow, the actual day, will probably be relatively boring and I'll do school all day. Yipee. But at least I had some good stuff beforehand. ^_^

Now of course I've been turning over other things in my mind. Such as deep topics of interest that people don't typically talk about. I suppose part of the reason I've been thinking so much is because at church, my parents Sunday School class has been doing The Truth Project (if you've never heard of it, go look it up. It's a great, wonderful, awesome "tour", as they call it). But with such a name, you can expect deep topics.
Such as
Where does evil come from?
Who is man?
What is truth?
Those get your mind working, let me tell you.
And the more I think about these things, it makes me consider what I usually think about.
Do those things really matter in the grand scheme of things?
Nope.
But do those things? Can these questions and the answers to these questions change someone's life?
Yep.
So what is more important to ponder and spend our time thinking about?
--
And really it interests me, because watching The Truth Project, you get to see videos of people from different world views talking about what they believe. Things such as - man is basically good, there is no free will, there is nothing but the cosmos and nothing outside of the cosmos, there is no evil in man, etc. And seeing these different world views, I have to wonder how people can possibly believe them. It's so difficult to see people fall for such awful lies.
But for now my mind is going dead. Next time I'll try to expound on one of these

And, as for more 'other doings'.....
Nail polish. Mock trial. Prince of Persia. Reading. Thinking some more. Piano. Friends. Bourne Identity. Laundry. My favorite socks. Pumps or flats? Sleep. Naps. Sleep deprivation. Music. School. Notes to self. Frizzy hair. Children. School vs. chilling out. Chilling out vs. naps. 1 hour long naps vs. 3 hour long naps.

Sleep is on my mind at the moment. Right now all I'm running on is the white chocolate mocha I drank earlier. Brain dead. Deprived of sleep. I'm becoming incoherent.
I think I'll go for now. And next time I shall try to expound on my deep thoughts.

New Year & Weird Resolutions

So. It's a new year. You're probably over all the excitement of the new year... yea... it's 2011.
And as it's a new year, most everyone has made new year's resolutions which will probably last a week, at best. Well, I too, have made some new year's resolutions. But they're not quite as normal as most people's resolutions are. I actually only started making a list last night, and the weird thing about these resolutions is for one thing, I'll be adding to them all year, and for another thing, they're not even really resolutions. They're more like a list of things I want to do this year.
So without further adieu, here are some of the things on my list, which I will continue adding on to over the rest of the year:

• Read 50 books
• Take a photography class
• Read the whole Bible
• Buy two new pairs of boots
• Get an outstanding witness award [in mock trial]
• Run a 5k
• See a shooting star
• Learn the definitions of 50 obscure words
• Apply for and win a scholarship
• Meet a famous person
• Watch 50 movies

And that is part of my list. ^_^ Strange, yes, but I'm more likely to do those things than to exercise regularly, 3 times a week, without fail. And besides. I'd rather have fun this year than work my tail off trying to stay in shape.

I guess in this new year, there are two things I'm striving for:
1. Honor God and grow closer to Him
2. Have a super exciting year

I feel like I really need to spend more time with God this year. I'm not terribly disciplined in a regular quiet time. And not just that, but I want to grow closer to Him. And that isn't accomplished by just reading my Bible. I know I need to start trusting more, start praying more, start letting Him live through me more. And that is what I'm striving for more than anything this year. I know it's what I need to do.
And the second thing I'm striving for? Well... I can explain that. Excitement. It's what I want. Last year was not only one of the worse years I've ever had, but it was quite boring. I want to do something really cool and exciting. Like go to Scotland over summer vacation. Okay, that's not happening, but I want to venture out some. Do something totally different for once. I guess I'm becoming one of.... those .... teenagers who wants to venture out and do something crazy and different.

And THAT. Is what I'm looking at doing over the next year.
We'll see how it goes ^_^

Happy New Year to all

~Madison